Nussbaum (2010, p. 37) considered that children need to ‘develop a capacity for sympathy or compassion’, sometimes through experiencing common events or feelings. When they do this, they can better appreciate what their actions have done to another person, for whom they may feel more affection. In fact, children may feel guilty and this helps them to change their behavior and views about other people, who they see more as individuals, to whom they need to relate, rather than issue peremptory orders to people, without reference to the other person’s feelings.
In this example of paraphrasing, there is more evidence of thinking about the original text (rather than just cutting and pasting) and a good attempt has been made to put it into different words. The same order of the original text remains, and a good tip is to quote a memorable phrase, i.e. a section you might find difficult to put into other words.